Once upon a time I was a chronic binge drinker. So let’s call it what it is – an alcoholic. It’s a cringey type of word that elicits images of piles of vodka bottles and day drinking. That’s not really my story, and it’s what kept me unwell for so long. I wasn’t a day drinker, I didn’t drink alone, and I didn’t drink every day, and that was enough to keep me in denial for many, many years. I went to treatment and accepted the fact that I had a problem with alcohol and my life had become unmanageable, and I stayed sober for 8 months. Then someone told me I wasn’t a “real alcoholic”, whatever that means, and I took to the Jolly Roger to prove her right. That didn’t go too well, and after eight months of being clean and sober, I relapsed for five years. I also moved halfway across the world to avoid any sort of backlash for the relapse and continued to binge on alcohol, and some other mind-altering substances!
Then I fell in a manhole on the 1st of January 2008 and decided it was time to clean myself up; literally and figuratively. So started the work of staying sober and getting well. I have discovered over the years that they are not the same thing. Not everyone who is sober is well, and not everyone who is well is sober, because not everyone who uses drugs and alcohol actually becomes addicted and dependent. Some research shows that about 15% of drinkers become problem users. So I was of the unfortunate few, the descendent of a long line of illustrious, problem drinkers. I just happened to be more dysfunctional than some as the years rolled on.
Anyway, I got clean and sober, and I have worked really fucking hard to stay that way for more than 16 years. My definition of recovery being that I don’t drink or use substances recreationally. I do use certain medicines therapeutically and as prescribed by a doctor, and I am extremely mindful in these situations of my use of these drugs. I have not misused any substance, prescribed or otherwise, in the entirety of my recovery process. I support harm reduction and moderation management in people who choose that direction (I am not capable of being moderate), as well as pharmacology and medication-assisted treatment. These approaches simply make life liveable and manageable for some people, and that aligns with what I believe about recovery, both personally and professionally.
But back to the reason for this particular post. After a few years in recovery, working abroad as an English teacher, I decided that I wanted to come home. I was not sure how I was going to do that, and on the advice of a friend, decided to explore becoming a life coach. I was dubious at the time and remember thinking that everyone and their cousin seemed to be completing a coaching course. Anyway, I started a course from my apartment in Saudi Arabia, and instantly recognised the power of the modality in terms of my own, and possibly others, recovery process. I thought I was onto something new and novel! A mad Google search led me to the work of a couple of people. One being David Collins and The Ubuntu Academy of Coaching and Training (U-ACT).
David and I first connected in October 2014, and he loves to remind me of how anxious and neurotic I was at that initial meeting. It was a day that changed my life forever. I had completed a life coaching course, as well as a recovery coaching course, by the time that we met, and I am forever grateful for the chance that David took on me almost 10 years ago.
Since I was in my teens, I have wanted to do something that made a positive difference in the world; to be able to contribute and make it a better place. And that is what I have the privilege of doing as a recovery coach. I started working at The Foundation Clinic and completed the U-ACT Certified Professional Recovery Coach (CPRC) training in late 2014. Now, every day, I get to make a difference in the lives of people I work with.
For anyone considering this vocation, because that’s what it is, you need to know some truths about the work. Working with people with severe substance use disorders and chronic addictions is not an easy job. It’s full of highs and lows, and the lows can be devastating, because unlike being a life- or business coach, our clients aren’t just grappling with everyday challenges, some of them are literally fighting for their lives. I thought I’d have a nice steady client base of soccer moms who drank too much wine and dabbled in tranquilisers. That’s not what happened! Of course, working in a private substance use treatment facility is not as brutal as working in a government facility, but it’s definitely not a cake walk. It’s also not the same as going to a 12-step meeting. What I hear in my individual and group sessions can be heartbreaking and unhinging, and the truth of addiction is that it kills people.
When my clients don’t make it, I end up at their funerals, not commiserating over the unrealised job opportunity or missed promotion. This doesn’t happen all the time, but it happens often enough and when it does it’s shattering. But for all the people who don’t make it, there are countless others that do. Of course there are slips and relapses along the way, but for some this is simply part of the long-term process. And who am I to judge, having had a five-year relapse after eight months of post-treatment sobriety and finally managing to hook into long-term, sustainable recovery.
I am excited and challenged by the work that I do as a recovery coach. It’s not just about helping people hook into recovery resources, it’s about holding space whilst people work through their deepest, darkest moments, learn to push through triggers and cravings, and become responsive to their most difficult emotions and experiences. Being a recovery coach is also about working with my own demons and shadows, and coming to terms with my deep wounds so that I can of service to others. It’s about ensuring that I stay well to be able to help others. It is not what keeps me sober, it’s why I stay sober.
What I mean by that, is that my work is not my recovery. I still go to therapy, practice mindfulness, journal, exercise, build and maintain healthy relationships, and live a spiritually principled life. Just because I work in the field of addiction doesn’t mean I am working on my addiction. That’s separate from the work that I do. I’ve seen many of my colleagues fall into the trap of believing that because they work in a rehab, it’s not necessary for them to do their own healing. But the truth is that if I want to stay well, I can’t do it by helping others be well. I don’t maintain my recovery by coaching, teaching, and facilitating. I stay well by doing the hard, personal and immensely rewarding work of recovery.
If you are thinking about how you can get more involved in the world of addiction treatment and recovery, then becoming a recovery coach is a wonderful option. It’s fulfilling and meaningful at times, challenging and infuriating at others. Most of all it is a “calling”, something that you can do for the rest of your life. Your “heroes” become people like Gabor Mate, Peter Levine, and Anna Lembke, and you might find yourself becoming super interested in topics like neuroscience and human behaviour, and how mindfulness and meditation support and anchor wellness. Or maybe that’s just me…
U-ACT does run regular Recovery Coach training courses in Johannesburg, as well as online, and I am always excited to be working with a new group of coaches. This program can be truly transformative, both personally and professionally, and I have experienced that first hand.
Some key benefits of completing the training include:
Gaining evidence-based tools and techniques to effectively support individuals, families, groups, and communities in their recovery journey.
Developing a deep understanding of substance use, addiction, mental health, and the recovery process.
Enhancing your ability to create meaningful connections and have courageous conversations.
Learning how to co-create sustainable recovery plans tailored to each client's needs.
Joining a supportive community of like-minded professionals dedicated to helping others.
Expanding your career opportunities in the growing field of recovery coaching.
Strengthening your own personal development, growth and self-awareness.
Acquiring skills to empower clients and promote lasting, positive change.
The training journey isn't just about certification – it's about making a real difference in people's lives and contributing to the field of addiction recovery. It takes time to build a successful coaching practice, and it’s totally worth the effort. I have never looked back, even when it’s been difficult and there have been times I wanted to give up and get a “normal job”. If I do my personal work that feeling fades and I remember that I get to do what I wanted to do even as a teenager, and that is make the world a better place by being of service to others. I am grateful and blessed that I discovered a way to do that!
Comments